*WOW*

Oh golly gosh
I dont think I have ever been so inspired or so moved, possibly in my life
 *Cirque Trottola*
In Westport, as part of the Westport Arts Festival...
Me and Jane went after our stint babysitting the show that we are both in, in the Hastings garage...

• Tiny tent, for starters...something you would see at electric picnic
• No pictures or video, or food or drink allowed...Jane and I came to the conclusion that those things just distract you from the performance, from the experience...so much time we spend documenting everything. I dont even feel like i was at Tegan and Sara because I spent so much time behind my camera...
• It was a French circus...everyone was v french...
• The women ushers had little red clip on tiny top hats on...short turned up jeans...and they kept talking back and forth over the 'stage' organiseing where people should sit...
• There were people from all walks of life there...young, old, artsy, middle class, upper class, lower class...hippys, goths, preps...you name it...it was so interesting to look into the crowd and see everyone's personal stories on their faces
• 3 performers...one, tall, bearded and frumpy looking, hunched over, the weight of the world on his shoulders. He looked deranged, like an escapee mental convict...like an alcoholic...a funtioning one at that tho...he opened the show my dragging himself into the centre...the music was in time to his movements...screeching violin bows on plates...it was so poetic and moving...oh my god the tension...i was about to pass out...
• The second...a woman, who looked more like a 12 year old boy...with a fiercely frightened but energetic face...her hair was deep pink, nearly red...and stood out like a hedgehogs spikes...her boyish clothes were fitted...there was not a bit on her...she was so so toned...the muscles and veins in her arms and legs...an amazing little body...so strong...she made all these tiny expressions with her face...so subtle, but alot like things that siobhan would do :)
• The last, was another man...he was slimmer in appearance then the first...lighter too...his clothes were loose...he looked very smart...with a hat on, and a jacket. 
• There was amazing chemistry between the first two...it was trust...tension, love, hate...awkwardness...frustration...understanding...so much was left totally unsaid...they gave you so much space for your own thoughts and ideas to come in and colour in everything...fill in between the lines...
• The music was so atmospheric
• Floating piano......up a ladder...bellowed little piano on the ground...the two musicians were at opposite corners...the chemistry between them alone, took my breath away...they were using the bows of violins on plates...old violins that squeeked in all the right ways...oh, jesus the music alone was worth every penny...
• It was all so physical...but not in the predictable way that circuses usually are...it was so clever and understated and humble...they looked like...like it was effortless...like they were breathing...there was so much heart in it....
• my favorite bit was when the thinish man came out with this very big old style sweeping brush, and he balanced a tapered ladder on the flat bit of wood, where the bristles are attached...then the woman came out with like a spotlight, which she attached to the bottom rung of the ladder...the lights were dimmed and she descretely put on a simple waist belt/harness thing...and then proceded to climb the ladder...while it was balanced on the sweeping brush. The light cast a shadow of her on the roof top...and I couldnt help but think of 'hope'...my piece in the festival...how it changes depending on the light outside...the darkness to light...And i dont know, something came over me...i was so so moved...this ladder to no where...and her climbing it, trusting that it was being counter balanced by the man holding the broom handle...so much trust and tension and darkness and light...little tears ran down my cheeks...

Thats what art is though...its something that moves you. it touches a central nerve. it taps into something deep within you. you might not even know what it means to you, or what it is really trying to say...what its intention is, but it speaks to you anyway...and you feel something...it moves you, like the ocean waves, pushing and pulling at your body as you walk into the water, a force that you cant really understand, but you cant stop either...it takes you out of yourself...so you feel things that you mite not have been able to otherwise...you think of things that you mite not have thought about...it just...art...or what i think art is...i think it has a higher purpose then to look nice on your wall at home...or in a gallery...thats all well and good...but good art, real art comes home in your mind and stays with you for days...it grows in your heart and makes a nest inside you...it doesnt care if you buy it for your wall, because it has already moved in and made a home inside you...and it wants to be with you because it knows how much you need it...and it needs you to love it and be remembered and grow itself and become something else and change and develope...

• any way...that little art rant pep talk is over now ^_^
• so yeh...amazing...balanced dress on broom as well and danced with that...it actually looked like it was a ghost...i nearly fell off my seat
• trapeze stunts which were nerve rackingly beautiful and intense...and funny....

It was amazing...and im so happy that i had the oppourtunity to go and be inspired. i feel so full.
I feel like ive eaten a big dinner...if my stomach was in my heart.
I havent get like this is so long
Its because their work came from the heart. And it was amazeing.