some things ive found and must not forget

Rachel Denny

maria kjoo
julien pacaud
julien pacaud

Josh Keyes

Now...how lovely are these? I'm including Josh Keyes in my thesis this year, and I still cant get over his paintings...not that I have to or should get over them. I look at them and instantly feel happy...its been a while since any art has made me feel so... nice .

It is imporatant for art to make us feel something...isnt it? And for art to mean something to the artist, and the viewer, and the casual viewer, and the occasional viewer, and the viewer who thinks that art is rubbish and pointless. Its hard not to lose site of that when your immersed in it all the time..it becomes more of a job then a passion.

So when I stumbled onto these on http://www.inhabitat.com/ can you imagine how happy I was?

Completely thrilled. And I can face painting again. I actually look forward to it!

Josh Keyes....mmm...lovely

alex at the spanish arch one night a few weeks ago...i like the light on her jeans and elbow

keelin with her handwriting overlain, sitting outside the college on one of those lovely days we very rarely have...





oh that felt wonderful!!!!im so happy those are finally up.
just had assessments there on thursday, which im so happy are over. thesis presentation on monday, not looking so forward to that, but i think itl go ok. and my graduation is tuesday, cant wait!!!
i got a wonderful dress thursday after my assessment for the graduation, its the nicest dress ive ever had, i cant wait to get all dolled up and boogie, its so desperately needed!

The Girls at Renmore Beach...3weekends ago I think...at this stage.
I realise I have been neglecting this space but hopefully, not for long!
Nothing happened this summer really anyway, Ill fill in all the blanks later, right now, i have to run home and do work for college...
It never stops!!!

(There are plenty of things i want to say but dont
things you dont know, and wont.
I feel it is a safer place for me to be
instead of you knowing me, internally.
I am being stong, but not too hard,
Im going to keep a happy face.
This time deap breaths will calm me down,
Ill escape and vanish into this familiar place.)



I made a checklist last night, which amused me, because i figured the amount of time it took me to compile the thing, i could have completed most of what was on the list...
I am quite nervous about today, tomorro and sunday.
i dont really know what to expect, and that is what is troubling.
the last time i was there, alex brought me, we sat in the car in the parking lot for a few minutes, didnt even get out...and i just cried.
i dont know why, maybe because it is so beautiful, and so loaded with a mixture of sad and happy memories.
but the time before that, i felt absolutely nothing for the place,no emotion.
it was like it had changed, a very strange feeling had decended on the place, and took me by surprise.
so now, i dont know. i dont know how i am going to react with actually walking where i walked before, going through the halls and dorms and classrooms (if they let us into the school that is)
im expecting flashbacks, as im suffering from them already...and tears, probably.

i have a heavyness in my chest, and my throat feels full of tears already
i was so emotional in that place, that i feel it did drain me of most of them...so going back, will i find them there? are they waiting for me.

it is amazing, these chapters in our lives, that are always so distant, until you read them, walk through their paths again...

i know i will be a little unsteady for the next few days, so i apologise in advance.
it is often unsettling, when you dine and walk with ghosts.

a little bit anxious

i am feeling a little bit sick at the moment because, well...im scared
and being scared is a good thing
if your not scared, then your not paying attention to what is happening around you

the kylemore reunion is this friday, saturday and sunday...and yes, im brickin it at the moment.
i will be thrown together with, quite a few people i havent seen, or talked to, for 4 years.
im sort of hoping no one will recognise me, so i wont have to talk...
aahh
why do i do this to myself?!
i know il be fine, once i get there. i will be fine

social interaction is not my forte, and im also pretty crap at spelling too...
but i would regret not going,so, i have to.
i cant back out and it so close to it.

on the plus side, were going to london in a month, and the boy is so excited, hes in a good mood all the time...i cant get over it :)

i have also realised that i cant update my blog with images from home, ill have to do it from alex's house...damn this stoneage internet connection...

:rolls eyes and sighs: